November 7th, 2001


(no subject)

Whitby was, as usual, a small seaside town with a sudden influx of darkness, satanism and cleavage. We met lots of friends, and I even recognised some of them, but the highlight of the weekend was probably buying a second hand pair of boots for �40. I am shallow enough to be a Goth, I am I am I am!
I�ve never spent so much on footwear in my life.
The bands didn�t do much for me, my favourite was probably the aptly named Sorrow which consisted of half of Strawberry Switchblade being really sensitive and deep. I did rather like it, but I did have to wonder what would happen if she won �10 on the lottery before going on. "My anguished heart sends pain through my soul ... mind you, I just won a tenner. Sunny side up, eh loves?" before launching into "Because I got high". Anne thought she was just a miserable caterwauling bitch but there you go.
It was also good to see the women were using the gents loos again, because I do think they add a touch of class. We don�t usually look after our toilets very well, but the presence of women does make us piss on the floor a little bit less.
Anyway, for those thinking of going in April, you might like to check out my Whitby Goth Etiquette Guide.

1. Pick on a random stranger you�ve never met before and confuse him all weekend by waving and saying hello. (I give up, who are you?) You�ll have to do this, because you�ll be ignoring anyone you actually do know.
2. If you do get caught in a conversation, remember to keep looking around for someone more important to talk to. This is a useful skill that you can use at Bicon as well.
3. Constantly remind everyone that the Goth weekends were better in ____ (insert date two years before you actually started going).
4. Spend four hours putting on your make-up, and still look as if you�ve just walked into a raspberry ripple.
5. Try on �5000 worth of clothes. Then buy a pair of shoelaces and a second-hand Duran Duran tape.
6. Never, never walk past a cashpoint.
7. And remember, small women only go to the bar so that large men can push in front of them.

Sigh ... I�ve now stopped having erotic dreams about Goths, so I suppose things are back to normal.
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